Food Fight!

Each week, I face the dreaded scale at my TOPS meeting wondering if it will reward me with a loss. There are so many weeks when it does not reward me that it is sometimes tempting to contemplate throwing in the towel. BUT WAIT! Let me think about this. My entire week in in my hands to do with as I please. Do I please to indulge in cookies? How about any variety of "junk" food? Second helpings are a temptation, especially pasta...or stew...or chili...or - oh, just about anything. What about a bedtime snack? What can I grab? Well, I don't keep much in the house (I just threw the cookies out to the backyard critters) so let me look around. There's an apple or celery, but they're even better slathered with peanut butter. Cereal with milk could suffice, but Cheerios? Don't I have to add sugar to make them taste even better? Cheese - I can eat a small chunk of cheese, but, well, that really pairs nicely with some crispy crackers. Maybe a simple slice of toast ...with butter and cinnamon sugar. Ooops, there I go again. Food seems to take over my life, and I keep looking at the nothing I have in the house and turn it into something.

Eating is such a habit. It's a necessary habit, but where did this love affair with food come from? When I remember festive times with family and friends, they all revolved around food. Lots of food, and much of it so full of calories, by the time I was ready to call it a night, even my elastic waist band felt tight. So there's a reason; good memories.

Well, but I eat when I'm alone. Food just tastes good, at least most of the time. But I discovered that I don't even have to enjoy it to eat it. Nope, I can just eat because, well, maybe I'm bored. Maybe I'm even just thirsty. What a concept. Can't be true.

So here it is, 11:30 p.m. Sunday night. The cookies are strewn about the back yard. There isn't much else that's grab and eat, so I'd actually have to put in some effort to eat anything - but there is leftover pasta. Nah. I'd have to microwave that. But wait, I remember eating cold spaghetti sandwiches when I was a child. Hmmmmm. Nah. Gross! Well, not really gross, but I know how I'll feel if I indulge in that, and I would not feel good.

What are the chances I can fill my glass with ice water and head to bed? Stacy's cinnamon chips! I just remembered they're in the bread drawer.

How on earth am I supposed to talk myself out of eating when it seems like the only thing I want to do? Let me think. What would it feel like to see the scale move downward - to lose weight? I have to encourage more of me to want to see that happen and discourage the part of me that thinks food is the answer to everything. This is something I CAN do, but will I?

Well, Thursday will be here soon. The answer is on the scale.